I had driven across the country, from New York to Florida to California. My dream had come true— one small part of it, at least. I was in Los Angeles, but I still had to actually find a place to live. Continue reading
I used to suffer from occasional insomnia. Especially on nights before a big event I was nervous about, like my first day at school or a big trip. I would get in bed early so I’d be fresh and rested for the big day. I’d lay down and close my eyes, but I couldn’t fall asleep. My mind was racing. I couldn’t stop thinking.What will this new school be like? Will I make any new friends? Will I still be shy? I didn’t realize at the time that my insomnia was related to my social anxiety. Continue reading
Die Verwandlung a.k.a. The Metamorphosis a.k.a. The Transformation
by Franz Kafka
Published: 1915
Read the eBook for free: http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/5200 or Buy the Paperback
The Metamorphosis is a novella about Gregor Samsa, a traveling salesman who wakes up one day to find himself transforming into a giant insect. As his transformation progresses, Gregor locks himself in his room, quits his job, and isolates himself from his family and the rest of society. Gregor’s parents and sister are repulsed as he becomes less and less human and more and more insect-like, until finally in the end…
(SPOILER ALERT)
…he dies.
Based on Franz Kafka’s diaries and letters, scholars agree that the author suffered from depression and social anxiety throughout his life. The Metamorphosis could therefore be interpreted as Kafka’s way of writing about his mental state. With that in mind, could the “metamorphosis” in The Metamorphosis be a metaphor for someone developing social anxiety? (Talk about meta…) Continue reading
Today, I am anti-antidepressants, but I wasn’t always. I wasn’t anti-antidepressants before I took antidepressants, and I wasn’t anti-antidepressants while I was taking them. To the contrary, I don’t think I could have been any more pro-antidepressants back then. Continue reading
From what I’ve learned, social anxiety comes from overthinking, particularly false negative thoughts. Thoughts about yourself and thoughts about what others are thinking about you. And from what I’ve learned from taking antidepressants, they stop your social anxiety thoughts by essentially stopping you from thinking altogether. So in a sense, antidepressants do work. They help stop you from thinking the negative thoughts that cause social anxiety. But at the same time, antidepressants also stop you from thinking positive thoughts. And creative thoughts. Continue reading
“Yesss!!! Finally!!! I did it!!!!”
That’s what I thought at the time. It was a combination of extreme excitement, relief, and optimism. That moment was about three years ago. I had just told my doctor that I have social anxiety disorder, and he wrote me a prescription for the antidepressant, Zoloft. Continue reading
My first introduction to fantasy sports was in 2009 when I joined a fantasy baseball league. I finished in second place that year and have loved fantasy sports ever since. 2009 was also Kansas City Royals pitcher Zack Greinke’s breakout year. He made the All-Star team, won 16 games, had 205 strikeouts, led the American League with a 2.16 ERA and 1.07 WHIP, and won the Cy Young Award. He wasn’t on my fantasy baseball team that year, and I wasn’t a Royals fan, but I was rooting for Zack Greinke’s success because I learned that, like me, he had social anxiety disorder. Continue reading
I love podcasts. I’ve learned more from free podcasts than I did from a $200,000 college education. There’s a podcast for literally every topic under the sun. Actually, there’s about twelve for every topic under the sun. A podcast can be broad or extremely specific. It’s basically radio on-demand. You listen to exactly what you want, exactly when you want to. And it’s completely free–except for the Audible and Stamps.com commercials that sponsor just about every podcast, though you can skip over them, anyway. While there are some podcasts I listen to for pure entertainment value, I listen to many more podcasts to learn. Continue reading
When I told my doctor that the antidepressant medication he prescribed me wasn’t really helping my social anxiety, he suggested I go see a psychologist for cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) in conjunction with the medication. That sounded fair enough, except, because the medication didn’t work, I still had severe social anxiety, so I was too shy to contact a therapist. Continue reading
Some call it social anxiety, others call it social phobia. Both terms refer to the same fear of social situations and are often used interchangeably, but I used to always only call it social anxiety. Continue reading
T.Z. Barry 